The Mistress of the Dark Park Place Log

as executor of the estate of your great aunt miss morgana talbot, i'm sorry to inform you of her untimely passing.
    whoa - i didn't even know i had a *good* aunt, much less a *great* one.

do you know you were doing fifty in a twenty-five-miles-per-hour zone?
    ummm, no, but if you hum a few bars i'll fake it.  (pause)  i gotta get a new joke.  this one's costin' me a fortune.

bloody mary.
    no hard liquor served past eight o'clock.  do you want a virgin?
maybe, but, uh, i'll have a couple of drinks first.

my name's elvira, but you can call me... tonight.

i tell you: i nearly *died*.  there she was, paradin' around in clothes that couldn't keep a titmouse dry in a drizzle.  i mean, it was next to nothin'.
    i'd say it was next to *plenty*.

please, i don't think we need to resort to name calling.  i think what calvin is trying to say is that this elvira is a person of... easy virtue, a purveyor of pulchritude, a one-woman sodom and gomorrah, if you will.  a slimy, slithering succubus, a concubine, a street walker, a tramp, a slut, a cheap whore.

he'd kill us if we went to your show.
    not to mention our parents.
        he'd kill your parents too?!

revenge is better'n christmas.

do you always wear the same dress?
    no, sometimes i like to wear something low-cut and sexy...

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